


Only to see him again

by basuan



Category: The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Boys Kissing, Child Abuse, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cutting, Drinking, Fluff, Hand Jobs, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Parent/Child Incest, Rape/Non-con Elements, Romance, Self-Harm, Smut, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-04
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:33:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23476258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/basuan/pseuds/basuan
Summary: Newt is being abused by his dad, with no one there for him. Until one certain boy might be just what he needed.
Relationships: Newt/Thomas (Maze Runner)
Comments: 16
Kudos: 87





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First of all TRIGGER WARNING!! So this will have more chapters, but I can't promise regular updating. But I'm already working on chapter two! This work is very dark and angsty, but you'll see some romance and fluff there as well! I hope you'll enjoy this piece and tell me what you think, or leave kudos if that's more your style<3

Newt was lying on the ground, not able to move. He was aching all over, nose bleeding. 

“You fucking faggot! Just fucking go kill yourself already! You don’t deserve to be here, in my house!” his dad yelled while slamming his belt on his back once again. Newt couldn’t help it, he let out a pathetic sob and was rewarded with another hit. Finally, after what felt like hours, his dad left the room, no doubt going to drink another bottle of wine.

It took over an hour for Newt to move, he might have even passed out, but he didn’t care. He tried to stand up but gave up that task quickly and just decided to sit on his bed for awhile. His face was wet of blood and tears. The pain felt overwhelming. How could he survive all this? How long could he carry on? It had started when Newt brought his first boyfriend to the house and his dad had caught him snogging him. Oh it had been hell after that. So it’s been a year now, he thought. His friend, Minho, didn’t know. Hell, he had no idea he was gay! 

After a long while Newt could hear his dad's snores from the kitchen. Mom would be home soon, and he couldn’t let her see him like this. Him and his dad had both kept it a secret. His mother only knew about his husband’s alcoholism, but not about his abusive behavior towards his son. Newt staggered to the bathroom and locked the door, just in case.

He looked at himself on the mirror. He laughed at how pathetic he looked. Dark circles under the eyes, messy hair and all that blood. I really should just kill myself, he thought bitterly. His hands started to move on their own accord. He had cleaned himself so many times it was a habit already. Careful with the nose and then disinfect the cuts from dad's bottle shards. Easy. He took a quick shower, trying not to cry again.

All nice and clean in his room he took out his phone. There was a couple messages from Minho.

From: Minho  
Hey shank I’m coming over to get you, were going out.  
We’re gonna get drunk tonight ay ;) 

Newt panicked. He’s coming here, soon. No no no no. He couldn’t see his dad, and he still had visible cuts on his neck. He had hoped to conceal them before school, but he was coming now. Newt stood up and felt a bit dizzy from that sudden movement. He hadn’t eaten in days, his dad didn’t do groceries. Once again he was on his way to the bathroom when he heard voices outside of the door. 

“Oh Mrs. Isaac! How nice to see you again! How have you been?” It was Minho’s voice. Newt knew he couldn’t avoid them so he just had to figure something out. And then his mom opened the door.

“Oh, hello darling”, his mom smiled a tired smile at him. He tried to return it while giving her a meaningful look. Dad’s not in a good condition now. His mom understood.

“Newt!” Minho shouted from behind his mom. “Hey dude, can I come in for awhile. It’s freezing out there!”

Newt looked at his mom in horror. “Oh honey, I’m very sorry, but I’ve had a long day and there’s nothing more I would like to do than have a nice nap in silence. You can come over another time.” She smiled at him and Newt felt so relieved. 

“Oh I totally will do that, now come here Newt and let’s go!” Minho pushed his jacket in his hands and Newt put it on quickly, trying to cover his neck.

Finally out of that house, Newt breathed out a relieved breath. He could be himself again. “So, tell me, where are we going?” He glanced at Minho, walking next to him.

“A new club opened a while ago, and I’ve heard it’s great. Gotta try that out!” Newt smiled. Hopefully the place would be dark enough for his scars not to show.

***

The club was crowded. Very crowded. It looked like a really nice club. Nice design. Newt and Minho got in and helped themselves with some drinks. They were sitting by one table, watching the crowd. They were all about their age. Newt was quite enjoying himself, after a few drinks he started feeling all nice and warm. Luckily it was so dim, Minho hadn’t noticed anything weird with his neck. 

Minho leaned over him and shouted straight to his ear. “I saw a cute girl, so excuse me for awhile.” And he was gone. Newt followed Minho with his gaze. His friend looked ridiculous. Trying to act cool in front of a blond girl. Well she didn’t slap him, that’s a good sign. Newt averted his gaze to elsewhere since his friend didn’t seem to be rejected.

“Hey, sorry man. May I sit here?” A boy was standing in front of Newt. Fuck, he was handsome. His dark hair tousled and cheeks red from drinking and dancing. 

“O-oh yeah, sure, go ahead”, Newt stuttered, cheeks flaming with embarrassment. The boy smiled and plopped next to him with a sigh. Newt avoided looking at him.

“What’s your name?” he asked. Newt glanced at him quickly.

“It’s Newt”, he said simply.

“Nice to meet you, Newt. I’m Thomas” Thomas extended his hand and Newt shook it. Thomas.

They sat there in silence, but it didn’t feel awkward. Thomas ordered some drinks and offered one to Newt. After a while, he accepted it. Sipping from his drink, he studied Thomas. They boy looked thin, but not too thin. He could see some muscles there, too. That black, long sleeved shirt did him well. 

“Like what you see?” Thomas asked with a snicker. Once again Newt’s cheeks were flaming. 

“I just… I umm…”

Thomas ignored him. “Come. Come, dance with me.” He was offering him his hand again, standing up. Newt just stared at him with wide eyes.

“I… I can’t dance” Thomas laughed, a heavenly sound.

“Just come, I’ll show you.” Newt didn’t move. What was going on? Thomas frowned. Then he leaned over him and whispered to his ear.

“If you don’t come, I’ll drag you.” Without another warning Newt was being dragged across the bar area to the dance floor. He tried to resist. Thomas stopped in the farthest corner.

“What are you-?” Thomas put his finger on his lips.

“You just need to follow me, okay?” Newt stood in silence as the boy put his hands on his hips and came closer. Then he started swaying around to the rhythm. Newt wasn’t able to say anything. He probably wasn’t thinking straight. The alcohol in his system had also taken away the pain from the beating before. 

After hesitating for a second, Newt started freeing himself and was swaying and turning to the beat of the song with Thomas. It felt magical. He felt so free. Like he hadn’t in a long time. He and Thomas danced for hours. Not caring of the world. As if there were just the two of them. Newt could have cried, that’s how happy he felt.

And then Thomas was there, right in front of him, Newt once again in his arms. Noses touching. They breathed on each other’s faces, trying to catch their breath. And Thomas kissed him. Softly first, but Newt wanted more, craved for more. He put his arms around Thomas’ neck and pulled him closer. They were kissing passionately. Newt was in heaven. But when Thomas was sucking at his neck, and felt the scars, he stopped. He looked at Newt in confusion. The boy panicked.

“What-?” But Newt was already running away. He couldn’t have anyone, anyone, know his secret. How could he have been so stupid? Tears were about to fall from his eyes. He wanted away. Away from all of this. He hated himself for going this far.

“Newt, stop!” Thomas was behind him and grabbed him by the arm. “What’s wrong?” 

Newt let out a sob and yanked his arm away. “It’s none of your fucking business!” he shouted and ran out of the door. He could hear shouts form behind him. Was it Minho? He didn’t care. He ran until he fell to the ground, sobbing. Newt stayed there for a long while before the tears stopped coming. He just wanted for all the pain to go away… 

After a while Newt started walking home slowly. He had forgotten his jacket and was shivering badly.

Finally home, he heard furious shouts from his parents room. He took off his shoes and cursed himself for not taking his jacket. He couldn’t use his hands properly since they were so cold. Newt went to the bathroom to take his second shower today. He didn’t look at the mirror. He didn’t want to see those belt marks again, not to talk about the ugly scars marking his thighs, wrists and neck. Only that the marks on his legs and arms he had done himself. 

Newt stood under the shower, maybe crying, he couldn’t tell. After the water had turned cold he stepped out and dried himself. He felt so numb, so tired. He thought of Thomas. Oh, how gorgeous the boy was. The way they danced, the way they kissed… Newt sobbed again, trying to muffle the sounds with his hand. 

In the safe of his room he sniffled quietly and stared at his drawer. It had been a while since… Newt traced a few scars along his wrist. Maybe it had been two weeks. Suddenly the image of Thomas’ confused face did the trick. Newt yanked the drawer open forcefully and took out his little razor blade.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! So this took a little longer than I had expected, sorry about that. But I wasn't happy with the one I wrote first, so I wrote the thing all over. Without further ado, please enjoy!

Newt woke up feeling cold and dizzy. He had an awful headache and he felt like he could puke his guts out. He opened his eyes just a bit. It was dim. How long had he been out? Newt tried to think of what had happened.

Minho came over and they went to the club, and there he met Thomas… Newt felt a pang in his heart. He had run away from him and… cut himself again. Newt dreaded to look down at his arm, but did it anyway. 

It was a mess. Angry red slashes scarred his both wrists, from elbow down. Newt felt sick. Seems like he was so caught up in the moment, that he didn’t realize what he was doing. 

He scrambled to his feet and made his way slowly to the bathroom. He didn’t have much energy. When was the last time he had eaten? He couldn’t remember. Newt fell to his knees in front of the toilet and started heaving. Nothing except spit and stomach acid came out, no wonder. He really should eat something. 

After a few minutes of sitting and leaning on the toilet, he stood up to clean his wounds. He searched the cabinet for disinfectants and bandages. The liquid burned and Newt hissed out in pain. There was a knock on the door.

“Newt? Honey, what are you doing in there?” It was his mom, she sounded worried.

“Oh, it’s nothing mom! Just a bit of a headache!” he tried to sound convincing.

“The painkillers are in the cabinet! But I just came to say that there’s a boy waiting for you in the hall. He said his name was Thomas! Should I invite him in?”

What the shuck? Why on earth would Thomas be here? “Oh, no mom. I’ll go to him! He doesn’t need to come inside!” Since his room was still a bloody mess, he couldn’t let Thomas see it. “Oh and mom? Is dad home?” he called out.

“No, honey, he’s out.” Out drinking, Newt thought. He was relieved to hear that. Newt hurried out of the bathroom after checking himself on the mirror. He didn’t look good, far from it, but this should make a do. His mom had probably went to the bedroom, so it would be just him and Thomas. 

Thomas stood in the hall, he looked a bit awkward, like trying to figure out what to do with himself. As he spotted Newt his eyes widened. He looked shocked. Damn, did he look that bad? Newt could feel his cheeks burning.

“Hey”, Newt said sheepishly.

“Hi Newt, I umm… Came to check on you.” Thomas smiled at him. Oh what a beautiful smile it was. His brown eyes shined and his hair was a clean kind of messy. He was fumbling with his sleeves. Those veiny hands looked so strong… He looked like a Greek god. 

Newt snapped out of his thoughts. “Oh? Well…thanks but, why would you do that? And how did you even know where I live?” He was dying to know that.

Thomas laughed as if embarrassed. “Well… When you left I decided to go home as well and… I found out that I actually live across the street form you. I spotted you on the ground just a block from here and was right behind you for the rest of the way. Dude, you were in a pretty bad shape so I thought as well to check up on you. I feel like I did something wrong, when you left in such a hurry…” Thomas studied his face for reactions.

He lived across the street? Newt didn’t know what to think about that fact. And he had seen him crying on the ground… How much more embarrassing could this get?

“That makes sense. But there’s no reason to come check up on me, I’m fine.” He tried to smile convincingly. Thomas studied him in silence. Newt saw he was doubting him, and his smile faltered.

“You know, I don’t believe you, but you don’t have to tell if you really don’t want to. But I’m just curious… How did you get those scars on your neck? It’s a bit of an odd place to have marks…” Thomas looked at him with curious eyes.

“Oh them! I umm was playing with my friend’s cat and he didn’t like it so… that happened.” He tried to laugh it off. He saw that Thomas still didn’t believe him.

“Honey! I’m going to work! Your friend can stay over for awhile but dad’s coming in an hour or so!” his mom shouted from the back of the apartment. Newt looked at Thomas. 

“I think it would be better for you to go now…” he said while averting his gaze.

“Okay, well, it was nice to see how you were doing, Newt”, he said with a weird expression. Then he smiled and opened the door.  
***

Newt was in his room doing homework, when his phone rang. It was a message form Minho. He didn’t even look at the message, as he saw the clock. 7:55pm. His dad should be home in a few minutes and he definitely didn’t want to be in the house at that time. He sprinted around his room, grabbing a warm hoodie and shoes and then he was out of the door.

Just as he thought he had made it out safe, he saw a taxi pull over around the corner. No doubt it was his dad. He looked around for a hiding place, but saw none. He couldn’t just run, they would see him. So he stayed in place, panic welling inside him by the passing second. 

The taxi stopped in front of their house and the driver came out to help his obviously drunk dad. 

“Hey, boy! Would you mind and come help here a little?” the driver shouted at him. Newt didn’t say anything as he walked over. The driver grabbed his dad’s other arm while he grabbed the other. They walked his dad to the door and Newt paid the man. 

Newt was still struggling to get the door open as the taxi drove off. 

“Son…” his dad mumbled.

“What is it, dad?” he asked through gritted teeth.

“Is your mom home?” 

Newt hesitated for a second. “No, she’s at work.”

“Is the taxi man gone?”

“Yes…” 

As Newt finally got the door open his dad stood up on his own, wobbling a bit.

“You know what that means, boy?” He pushed his finger to his chest as he stared at him. Newt panicked.

“I’m not coming in. I’m going out.” He tried to sound confident despite the panic.

“Hell you are! Probably gonna sell your slutty ass for the disgusting men, now are you?” his dad yelled.

“No, I’m-“ He was cut off when his dad put his hand around his neck.

“I’ll show you what you deserve, you faggot!” Spit was flying from his alcohol reeking mouth. The man stepped back and kicked him to the stomach with surprising force. Newt doubled over as he yelled out. Tears were welling in his eyes. He had to run. 

As his dad staggered, struggled to stay up, Newt made a run for it. He ran the best he could, still feeling pain from the kick.

Newt ran to the close park, too exhausted to continue. He needed food, badly. Too bad his dad took all his money for alcohol. Newt plopped down to a bench and tried to catch his breath. It was a cool autumn night and he totally was wearing too little. He could see his breath in the air. Newt closed his eyes, trying to calm himself. That had been a close call. Luckily they were still outside as his dad started kicking him.

“Hey”, he heard a small voice next to him. Startled, he opened his eyes, and saw Thomas in front of him. Newt tried to act natural.

“Oh, hey. I was just doing my evening run. What are you doing here?”

“Don’t even try, I saw everything”, Thomas sat next to him, looking up to the stars.

“What do you…” He lived across the street. Shuck. “Oh! Oh…” What could he say? He was starting to panic again.

“Newt, you should tell someone about that. Hell, it was close I didn’t call the police! Luckily you got away…” Thomas finally looked at him, but Newt didn’t return the gaze.

“No, I couldn’t do that.” He had no idea what to do. This boy was the first ever to find out.

“Why not? It looked bad… How long has it been like this? Does you mom know?” 

“Damn, you ask a lot of questions. No, my mom doesn’t know. And I can’t tell anyone, because… we wouldn’t survive with dad gone… My mom would be heartbroken, it’s already hard for her as it is.”

Thomas took his hands in his. Newt looked up in shock. They felt so warm… without realizing it, he leaned closer to Thomas, searching for the warmth.

“Geez man! You’re freezing! We gotta warm you up!” And then he hugged him. Hugged! Newt hadn’t been hugged in a long time. He completely melted to the warm touch.

“I guess going to your house is out of the question… Would you mind coming at my place? I live alone so… we wouldn’t be bothered”, Thomas said, leaning back enough to look Newt in the eyes. 

Part of him wanted to say no, but how could he refuse? Not only did he need the warmth of a home physically, he had a change to be with Thomas longer. Newt was in shock as he realized how much he actually craved for the boy’s company. 

So he nodded. Thomas smiled at him and rose up, not letting go of his hand.

“So, come on then!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> READ THE TAGS!! I added there something that might be triggering so TRIGGER WARNING AGAIN!! Well... I've got nothing else to say, so please enjoy!

Thomas and Newt walked back in silence. It was comfortable, though. Thomas never let go of his hand, and he was grateful for that little warmth it offered. They both were gazing up at the starry sky. 

“There we go”, Thomas said as they arrived at the house. Newt glanced nervously around, the house was literally right across his home. Newt could make out his dad from the living room window.

“Thomas, please hurry.” What if his dad saw him? He hoped against hope that it was too dark for that. Thomas understood and yanked the door open with a little more force than necessary.

Safely inside the house Newt breathed out in relief. Thomas gave him a weird look. “What?” Newt asked. Thomas shook his head and gestured for Newt to take off his shoes. Newt did that and followed the boy deeper to the house.

“I’m gonna make some tea!” he called from the kitchen as Newt studied the living room. It was a small cosy apartment. Not many colors. How fancy, Newt thought. The couch looked rather new and comfy. Newt sat on it while waiting for Thomas.

“Hey Thomas! How long have you lived here? I haven’t seen you.”

“Only for two weeks now.” Well, that explains.

Soon after Thomas appeared with two steaming mugs. Newt took it gratefully. “You’re offering me drinks every time we meet, I have to make this up to you”, he said, smiling.

“No need for that”, the boy said back. They drank for a while in silence, Newt holding on to the cup with both hands, still freezing from outside. Just as Newt thought Thomas wouldn’t talk about what had happened, the boy started talking.

“So… You understand that I can’t let this thing slip away, do you? This is serious, Newt, what he just did there, is wrong. Very wrong.” He looked serious. Newt nodded, not meeting his gaze. “How long has this been going on? And doesn’t anyone know?”

Newt wasn’t sure if he should tell him the truth. Thomas sensed that. “Look, I’m just trying to help you. There something in you that just wants me to… protect you, somehow. It feels weird, I’m not used to this kind of feeling, but I just know that I have to help you. So, would you please let me?” He sounded honest. Newt looked up and only saw honesty and worry in his eyes. Maybe Thomas was worth trusting.

“A year, maybe a little longer. That’s how long. That’s when he found out that I was… that I was gay.” He was almost whispering.

“Oh, Newt… I’m so, so sorry.” He placed his hand on his thigh. Newt tensed.

“What’s wrong?” Thomas sounded alarmed.

“No, no it’s nothing”, he reassured. He was glad he hadn’t cut on his thighs in a while. Oh what a thing to be happy about.

Suddenly there was pain in his stomach. Newt grunted and doubled over himself. 

“Hey! Hey Newt what’s wrong? Are you in pain?” Thomas put his hand on his back. Newt knew where this pain was coming from. He was so starved that the constant pain in his stomach was becoming stronger.

“Don’t worry, I’m just a bit hungry…” he said through gritted teeth, still doubled over.

“A bit? When did you last eat?” Newt shrugged.

“Might have been a couple days ago, I don’t really know.”

“What..? Okay, stay here, I’m going to make something for you!” Thomas stood up and went to the kitchen. Newt was too exhausted to argue, he needed that, and could pay back some other time. He laid down to the couch, gripping his stomach.

***

It didn’t take Thomas too long. After half an hour he came from the kitchen.

“Here, I made some vegetable soup. Don’t eat too fast, so it won’t come up. I’ll let you take the rest of it home.” Thomas smiled down at him and offered the bowl.

Newt sat up slowly and started eating. God, it was good. Newt started devouring the food.

“Hey, hey! Slow down! That won’t do you any good!” Thomas laughed a bit.

“Sorry, it’s just so good…”

When Newt finished, he felt so much better. As if life had come back to him.

“Wow, so you really do have a skin color!” Newt looked at Thomas in confusion. The other boy was smiling from ear to ear. “You just looked so pale, but now you have some color back to your cheeks!”

“Oh really?” Newt smiled as well. 

They didn’t say anything for a while. Just stared at each other. Newt felt himself blushing. Thomas looked at him so… caringly.

“Thomas?” The other boy hummed. “Why do you help me? Really?” Newt was whispering, for some reason it felt rude to speak loudly in this silence.

“I don’t even know, Newt… I could say it’s something everyone should do, when they see another human being treated like this, but… You’re special, Newt. I knew it when I first saw you. There’s something about you, that wants me to just…” His voice drifted off and he started leaning closer, his gaze fell from his eyes to his lips.

Just inches from touching, he stopped, and looked back up again. “May I?” Newt nodded, not daring to say anything.

And they kissed. Thomas’ lips felt so soft. Newt felt himself leaning toward the boy. Thomas placed his other hand on his chest, pulling him down. Newt looked at the boy hovering over himself. He was already out of breath.

“You’re beautiful, did you know that?” Thomas whispered, but didn’t give the blushing Newt time to answer as he leaned down again. 

This time it was more passionate. Newt threw his hands behind the other’s neck, pulling him as close as possible. Thomas started nibbling at his earlobe.

Newt moaned at the sensation. He clasped his hands over his mouth, looking at Thomas in shock. The other boy looked also surprised. “Sorry, Thomas, I just-“ he started explaining.

“Don’t apologize, do it again”, he said, looking straight to his eyes. Newt felt like his face was on fire. 

Thomas leaned back down again, this time licking his neck, clearly avoiding his few scars. Newt couldn’t help it, and moaned again.

“Shuck, Tommy…” Now where did that come from? Newt didn’t care much, just pulled Thomas back up and kissed him with passion he didn’t know he had. He could feel Thomas’ bulge through his clothes. No doubt he was in the same situation. Thomas started fumbling with his shirt, raising it up.

Newt panicked. He couldn’t do that. He would see his scars, and Newt couldn’t deal with that.

“Thomas. Thomas, stop”, Newt said, pulling his shirt down. Thomas was still sucking his neck.

“Why? What’s wrong?” he asked, still lost in a haze.

Newt pushed him off of himself, breathing heavily. Thomas looked at him in confusion and shock. “Newt? What-?”

“I’m sorry, Thomas, but I… I can’t let you do that…” He looked down in shame. Thomas kept silent for a while.

“Okay. Okay, it’s fine. I should have asked first.” He sounded sincere.

Newt glanced at him. “Sorry…”

“Hey, don’t apologize, there’s no need for that.” Thomas smiled at him. Newt tried to smile back.

“I think… I should go…” Newt stood up, and for once, he didn’t feel dizzy. That soup made wonders. “Thanks for the tea and soup, I really needed that. I swear I’ll pay you back when I get money.” He smiled down at the other boy.

“No, don’t even dare to think of that. I’m not gonna accept anything. But hey, you should take the rest of the soup with you!” Thomas stood up.

“No! No, I can’t bring it home! My dad… He…” Newt didn’t want to say it out loud, but luckily Thomas understood.

“Well, then you should definitely come over again to eat, right?” He smiled. 

Newt nodded. “I should, yeah.”

Newt left the house soon after that, quickly crossing the road. He hoped his mom would be home…

The boy was taking his shoes off, when his dad staggered to the hall. Newt tensed, but tried to act normally.

“Hey, dad”, he said, not looking at him.

“I saw you”, his dad simply said. Newt broke in cold sweat.

“What… do you mean, dad?” His voice was shaking.

“I saw you coming from that boy’s house! You were sucking his dick, weren’t you? Letting him fuck your ass?” His dad shouted. Newt cowered. 

“No, that’s not what-“ His dad kicked him to his side and Newt fell to the ground. The man grabbed him by his hair and started pulling him deeper to the apartment. Newt yelled out in pain. He couldn’t help but be dragged around.

“I’ll show you how you should be treated. I bet you’ll like this.” His dad threw him to his room, on his bed. Newt quickly turned around to look at his dad. 

His dad was standing right beside him, ropes in his hands. What the shuck? Newt thought. He was panicking, and wasn’t breathing properly. He was too afraid to move.

“Give me your hands, now”, his dad ordered.

“Dad, no, what are you going to-“ Slap across the face. Slowly Newt extended his arms, lowering his face to hide his tears. The man started tying his hands together, painfully tight. Newt didn’t want to think of what was going to happen. His dad had never acted this way…

The man pulled the now tied arms over his head. His dad was tying him on his bed. On his shucking bed! Newt choked on sobs. This couldn’t be happening…

“Shut up you slut! You don’t cry when random men on the street fuck you, do you?” His dad slapped him again, more forcefully.

As Newt whimpered, his dad moved to take off his pants. “Stop! Stop! You’re sick! You’re shucking sick!” Newt cried out. This time his dad hit him straight to his stomach. Unable to move, Newt tried to catch his breath.

“Please stop… Please…” He was so, so exhausted. He wanted to die. He couldn’t do this anymore…

His dad had finished tying his legs and was now undoing his own pants. Tears were silently running down Newt’s face. He forced himself not to think of what was about to happen.

As his dad adjusted himself between his legs, shouting insulting words to him, Newt heard none of it. He looked up, to the ceiling. 

But then immense pain seared through him. His dad’s shucking fingers were inside him! Newt closed his eyes and tried to think of anything else except what was happening to him right now.

And then his thoughts crossed to the boy across the street. Thomas. Or Tommy, like he had called him in their moment of passion. Suddenly Newt felt none of the pain. He could get through this, Thomas would help him, he was sure of that. Oh Tommy… What was the boy doing now? Maybe curled up on his comfy couch, thinking of him? Newt felt new tears dripping from his eyes. Oh what he would do, just to see him again. To get out of this hellhole…

“You like that, don’t you?” his dad grunted, still pulling his fingers in and out of him. Newt snapped out of his comforting thoughts. “But I bet you’ll like this much more…”

Newt screamed, when his dad pushed his dick inside him. It burned, it hurt so bad. Newt was sure he would pass out soon, if it didn’t stop. 

“You like that? Disgusting.” His dad was grunting, thrusting inside him. 

Newt closed his eyes, trying to shut the disgusting voices away. Tommy… Please help me…

For Newt, it felt like this had been going on for hours, but maybe it had just been ten minutes. But finally, his dad came inside him, the disgusting warm liquid dripping out of him. 

His dad rose up, slowly. He undid his ties, and kicked him to his ribs once again, as if making sure he wouldn’t try anything. Newt wouldn’t have dared to, anyway. 

Finally free from his bounds, his hands plopped down next to him. He curled in on himself, just wanting his dad to be gone… 

The man stood in the middle of the room for a while, watching his son.

“Listen, boy…” Did the man sound like he regretted it..? “Your mom is in the hospital. A car accident.” And with that, he left the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the middle of all this angst here's a bit of that promised fluff! Please enjoy!

Newt laid on the bed for hours, not moving an inch. All the time tears were running down his cheeks, wetting his sheets. He could hear his dad opening bottles and cans, and eventually his snores. 

The man had said that his mom was at the hospital. Newt didn’t think anything could get any worse. What had happened to his mom? Was she going to be okay? Was she even awake right now? So many questions ran through his head. He wanted to call his mom, ask if she was okay, but he knew he couldn’t. Not like this.

It was probably well over midnight, when the man left the house. Most likely to a close bar to numb himself. Newt didn’t want to see that man ever again. He didn’t even want to call him his dad anymore. He hadn’t been a dad for him since last year.

Sudden anger took over him and he sat up. He was shaking and wanted to punch or destroy something. He looked around the room and decided to just hit the wall. He stood up with wobbly legs. Pain form his lower body sent him back down and he yelled out in pain and frustration.

He couldn’t do this anymore. What did he do to deserve this? Why him? Why?

Newt started screaming and screamed until it came too painful to continue. He started scratching himself all over, just wanting the disgusting skin off him. He banged his head to the floor. He just wanted it all gone, it hurt too much…

He looked at his drawer. He knew that it would help him to get rid of the disgusted, empty feeling for a little moment. Deep down he knew that Thomas would help him, but he couldn’t go to him now, he felt too much like a burden.

I should just kill myself… That man has always been right. I am a disgusting faggot…

Newt yanked the drawer open and found the razor blade quickly. He leaned his back on the bed and started cutting everywhere. His thighs, wrists, tummy, whatever he had easy access to. Somehow the tears found their way down his cheeks again.

His head started to feel a little dizzy from the loss of blood. Had he gone too far? Well, it didn’t matter anyway…

Newt was closing his eyes, as his mind crossed to the beautiful boy. Tommy… Newt opened his eyes and forced himself up. What was he thinking? All he had to do was go to him, and it would be okay…

With the little energy that he had, he found himself a hoodie and pants and made his way slowly through the apartment. Every step brought pain from his bottom to his whole body. Newt could see some shattered bottles in the living room and kitchen, but didn’t care. He had to see Thomas.

He didn’t bother with shoes as he staggered out. It wasn’t that far, he would make it. The street was cold and empty, which Newt was grateful for. Rather quickly he was at Thomas’ door and rang the doorbell. Just as he was doing that, he thought what time it might be. Thomas would probably be asleep… 

But then the boy opened the door, with a sleepy face and a worn out T-shirt.

“Newt? What happened? Is everything okay?” he mumbled a bit sleepily.

Newt broke down. He sobbed and fell to the ground, too exhausted to keep himself up anymore. He was shaking, from cold or something else.

“Newt! Newt get inside, it’s cold!” Thomas was helping him get inside the house, eyeing him warily. “Newt tell me what happened!” They sat down to the couch, Newt sniffling.

“Thomas I… I don’t wanna talk about it just… Can I stay here for the night?” He looked up to the boy with begging eyes.

“Of course! Of course you can! You can stay the whole week, since we have our autumn holiday, yeah?” Newt didn’t respond.

“Do you mind me taking a shower?”

“No, no, go ahead! I’ll prepare a bed for you meanwhile”, Thomas said with a kind smile. This time Newt tried to return it.

***

Newt stared at himself in the mirror. He had cleaned himself up the best he could. But now he saw what was under all that blood. Once again he hadn’t realized how much he had cut himself. There was evidence of it all over his body… He looked hideous. And earlier that day Thomas had called him beautiful. Oh how wrong he was…

He put his clothes back on and left the bathroom. He felt absolutely exhausted, he just wanted the sleep to take away his pain and horrors of the night.

“You can sleep on the bed, I’ll just sleep on the couch.” Thomas was smiling at him, sitting on his bed. His smile faltered when Newt just looked at him tiredly.

“Hey, do you wanna talk about what happened? You look so…” he didn’t seem to find any words. Newt tried his best to smile.

“No, I… I just need to sleep, but… Can I please stay on the couch?” He couldn’t imagine laying on a bed right now, even if it wasn’t his own…

“No, it’s totally fine with me to sleep on the couch-“

“Please, Tommy… Please?” Thomas looked at Newt in confusion, but gave up.

“Okay… Of course you can do that.” He smiled at Newt and asked if he would want to eat anything. After refusing, Newt went to the living room to settle himself.

***

“Newt! Newt, wake up! Hey, it’s okay, it’s okay! Wake up!”

Newt jerked awake and sat up, breathing heavily. He was confused, where was he? He saw Thomas in front of him, gripping his shoulders.

He screamed and pushed the boy away. He felt all sweaty and sticky…. What happened?

Oh.

He had had a nightmare of his dad, that man, doing things to him while he was tied to his own bed…

Newt sobbed and curled in on himself. He tucked on his hair and whimpered.

“Hey! Hey, what’s wrong? Newt! Talk to me! How can I help?” Thomas was still shaking him.

“Let go! Let go of me! You’re sick! You’re fucking sick! Stop! Please stop!” Newt was now screaming with his eyes closed, becoming oblivious of the world, just images of that man…

Suddenly it was too hard to breathe, and he tried to suck in air, but it wouldn’t just come. Newt opened his eyes in terror. Thomas was still there, holding him. He was talking to him, but Newt couldn’t make out any words…

Suddenly Thomas took his hand and placed it on his chest. 

“-follow me, okay?” Newt heard. 

Thomas took in big breaths and let it out. Naturally, he started following his rhythm and it didn’t take him too long to breathe normally.

Finally calmed down, Newt looked up from his hand to Thomas’ eyes. He saw relief in them, but there was also worry.

Newt looked down in shame. Had he just had a full blown panic attack in front of this man? As if there wasn’t enough things for him to worry about…

“There we go…” Thomas didn’t let go of him. Newt just sat still, looking down. 

A few minutes passed like that.

“What time is it?” Newt finally asked, whispering, voice hoarse from screaming.

“It’s 11 am. You slept for a few hours. How are you feeling?” Thomas caressed his back. Newt shook his head, he didn’t want to talk. 

Suddenly Newt’s phone rang. He fumbled and picked it up from his pocket. It was Minho.

“Hey”, he said, trying to sound okay.

“Hey man! You sound like klunk. You down for some drinking tonight?” Minho sounded excited. Newt let out a sigh.

“No, I don’t think so… I’m pretty tired… Let’s go some other time?” 

“Oh come on, Newt! But okay. You better keep your promise then!” And with that he hung up.

Thomas looked at him. “Was that your friend?” Newt nodded.

“I’m gonna make some breakfast for us… Eggs and bacon sound good?” Newt nodded again, not meeting his gaze.

***

The day went peacefully. Thomas didn’t pressure Newt into talking, and Newt was grateful for him for doing that. After they had eaten breakfast, they watched a movie. It was an American movie Newt hadn’t seen before and he was actually enjoying himself.

Thomas made Newt feel at ease. He made some jokes and Newt laughed. And at some point he found himself in Thomas’ lap, being caressed by the other boy. Newt hadn’t felt so loved in a long time.

After the movie ended, they watched another one. Before they even knew it, they had spent the whole day watching movies. Neither of them complained. Only when the clock hit 7 pm, did Newt get up from Thomas’ lap.

“Are you feeling better now? You seem happier.” Thomas was smiling, and this time Newt actually returned it.

“I am, actually. Thank you, Thomas. This was exactly what I needed.” 

He leaned in to peck his lips a bit. They were both smiling like idiots. Newt leaned back in, this time the kiss lasted longer. Thomas was starting to pull him down, playing with the hem of his shirt, but Newt panicked. He pushed Thomas down instead and hovered over him.

Thomas looked at him in surprise. “Sorry, Tommy…”

The boy looked confused. “Newt… Are you okay? Something really bad happened last night, I know it.”

Newt averted his gaze and rose up. Thomas followed his gesture.

“You know, talking about it could make it better…” 

Suddenly Newt remembered. His mom was in hospital! She had been in a shucking car accident! Newt felt horrible for forgetting. How could he?

“Sorry, Thomas, I need to make a call right now”, he said and left the room.

Newt dialed his mom fast and walked around the kitchen anxiously. She didn’t answer, so he called her again. This time she picked up.

“Mom!”

“Oh, Newt darling! I’ve been missing you! Did your dad tell you what happened?” Newt winced at the mention of that man and his mom’s tired voice.

“Yeah… He did, but… Are you okay? When are you coming home?”

“Oh, don’t worry about it! The doctors said I should be here for a few weeks. I broke my shin bones, you see…” her voice drifted off. “But I’m okay! It’s not even that painful! But you and dad will be doing just fine for these few weeks, I know that!”

“Oh, mom… I’m so sorry…” Newt could feel himself tearing up.

“No, don’t worry about me, honey. Hey, I have to hang up now… It was lovely to hear your voice!”

“Okay, bye mom…” And so they hung up. Newt felt mostly relieved. His mom was going to be okay. She sounded exhausted, but still positive. Newt slumped against the kitchen counter and let the tears fall.

“Newt? What happened?” Thomas entered the small kitchen.

“My mom… She was in a car accident… Said she would have to stay in the hospital for a few weeks… But she’s going to be okay, I know it.”

“Oh, Newt…. I’m so sorry to hear that…” He pulled Newt close and hugged him tightly.

“No it’s fine, it’s just that… I have to spend that whole time with… with that man and I can’t I-“ He choked on a sob and Thomas pulled him even closer.

“He hurt you again, didn’t he?” the boy asked softly. Newt nodded.

“He did something… something he had never before. He…” Newt couldn’t finish, sobs wrecking him.

“Newt, look at me.” He put his hands on his cheeks and made Newt look at him. He felt ashamed at how vulnerable he must seem. He was a mess. “It’s okay now. I won’t let him hurt you anymore. You can stay here for as long as you want to. You never ever need to go to that house again, okay?”

Newt wanted to believe Thomas so bad, and so he nodded. They stayed like that for a while, Newt’s sobs slowly ceasing to sniffles. 

“I’m gonna just… take a shower now… Could I borrow a shirt from you, please? This one is quite dirty already…”

“Yes, of course. I’ll leave it in the bedroom.”

***

Newt stepped out of the bathroom, only pants hanging low on his hips. 

“Oh, you finished quickly I was just-“ His eyes widened as his gaze fell to Newt’s body. Newt froze in place in shock.

“Newt…” He didn’t move, neither of them did. Newt was breathing heavily, not knowing what to do. Now Thomas knew. He could see everything. All his scars, old and new.

“Oh, Newt…” Finally Thomas moved, he came to stand in front of him. He extended his hand, as if wanting to touch him, but hesitated. “Why would you…?” Newt was tired of crying, so he just stood there, not moving or speaking. 

But still sniffles filled the room. Newt looked up in shock. Thomas was crying, looking at him with pain in his eyes. He didn’t know what else to do, so he just went to sit on the bed, pulling Thomas with him.

“Tommy, hey, don’t cry…” 

“No, it’s just that… Newt, you’re so beautiful and amazing, but then you do this to yourself… Newt, you don’t deserve any of this! You don’t shucking deserve this kind of treatment! Why…” Thomas wiped his tears away when they stopped flowing.

He pulled Newt to his arms, tracing the lines striping his body with angry red. 

“There’s so many recent ones… Newt, what happened?” He was whispering to his ear. Newt closed his eyes, letting the tender touch comfort him. Maybe it was finally time to accept help… And so he started talking. 

He told Thomas everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think there'll be one or two more chapters. I'm pretty sure I'll finish this work next week! Thank you all who have read, commented or left kudos! Everything means so much for me! <3


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it guys! The final chapter! Here's some Newtmas smut for you all ;) Please enjoy!<3

Newt and Thomas sat on the bed for a long time. Newt took some pauses as he told his story, not able to continue at times. He had never opened up to anyone like this before, not even to Minho. Somehow he trusted Thomas. 

Right now Newt had told Thomas how he had gotten home after leaving his house the other day. 

“He dragged me to my bedroom by my hair, tied me to the bed and…” Newt looked down to their entwined hands. Thomas was gently caressing them. He had yet to say anything. Newt kept silent for a while.

“He raped me, Thomas. He raped me.” Thomas sucked in a breath. Newt didn’t dare to look at him. Saying those words out loud took him over to the edge and he started crying. He was sure Thomas would find him disgusting. He was a mess, ruined and so disgusting… He took his hands away and shifted further from Thomas.

“Newt… Newt, I am so, so sorry you had to go through that…. Oh my god… How could…?” Newt sobbed and hid his face in his hands. Thomas wrapped his arms around him.

“No! Go away! I’m disgusting! I’m so worthless! Go away!” he shouted, pushing Thomas away.

“Newt! What are you talking about? You’re anything but that!” Thomas came to him again, pulling the sobbing boy to his arms. Newt didn’t resist for long, he was just so exhausted…

They stayed like that in silence. Thomas stroked his head, arms, anything. It felt so soothing… Newt’s eyes started to droop when Thomas finally spoke up.

“You’re so strong, did you know that?” he whispered right to his ear. Newt looked up to the boy. In his eyes he saw tenderness, honesty and also a bit of worry. 

Newt swallowed and opened his mouth to speak. Thomas placed his finger on his mouth.

“No, you’ve already said so much, now it’s my turn.” He slid his hand from Newt’s lips to his cheeks and back to his hair. Newt didn’t argue.

“You’re so strong, like I said. You’ve gone through all that, and believe me, I couldn’t have done that. You’re so beautiful, inside and out. I swear I could stare at those beautiful, dark eyes for hours and wonder of the secrets they hold. Newt you’re such a selfless person, in a good way. How you protect your mom is unbelievable… I… I don’t think no words in the world could describe how wonderful a person you are. Do you believe me?” All the time Thomas was looking to his eyes. Newt was blushing, hard.

“Do you?” he asked again. Newt averted his eyes, not able to process what he just had heard. Thomas gave a little laugh and kissed his forehead. “What I said, was the truth, so you better believe it.”

“Tommy… That’s…” He couldn’t even finish. He was crying all over again. But this time it wasn’t from pain. He reached out to pull Thomas down.

He pressed their lips together, a bit forcefully. They kissed for a while before Newt rose up to adjust himself better on top of Thomas. He was straddling him and the position allowed Thomas to nibble at his neck. Newt arched his head backwards to allow Thomas more space. Now that the boy knew how he had gotten the scars on his neck, he gave them extra attention. He was licking and sucking at them all the time whispering praises to him. It all made Newt dizzy.

“Tommy…” He was moaning again. Thomas grabbed his hips and pulled him closer for a kiss. It was full of hunger and lust. 

After a while Thomas moved to kiss Newt’s body. He started placing kisses all over his chest, sides and stomach. Wherever he could reach. Once again he was caressing his scars.

“You’re so, so beautiful Newt…” it came out almost a moan. Newt grunted and pushed Thomas down. The boy looked up at him in surprise. Suddenly Newt hesitated. He couldn’t help his mind wandering to that man… Almost in the same position as he was now…

Newt stood up quickly, he was breathing heavily, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

“Newt? What’s wrong?” Thomas stood up more slowly.

“It’s just… My… That man...” he couldn’t focus on words. 

“Hey, hey don’t worry, Newt. We don’t have to do anything like that if it makes you uncomfortable, okay?” Thomas came to him and held his shaking body against his. He kissed his head until he calmed down.

“I hate him, Tommy. I hate him so much…” Newt was crying again. Thomas didn’t say anything, just held him tighter. 

***

After Newt had calmed down it was already late so they decided to eat some leftovers and go to bed. Newt decided to sleep on the couch once again while Thomas made himself comfortable in the bedroom.

But sleep wouldn’t come to him. He shifted and turned for what felt like hours. His thoughts always came back to what had happened that day. That boy who he barely knows, now knows everything about him. The thought kind of scared him, but there was also something comforting about it. What made him tell all that to Thomas was a mystery to him. 

He could hear Thomas use the bathroom. So he was awake too, he thought. With a sudden impulse he called for him.

“Thomas?” He heard the boy walking through the apartment.

“Is something wrong?” he didn’t even sound sleepy. Newt sat up and searched for Thomas’ figure in the darkness.

“No, I just… Couldn’t sleep.” Thomas gave a little laugh and came over to him. Newt made room for him on the couch.

“What are you thinking of?” he asked.

“About you.” Newt blushed, he hadn’t meant to say it that way. “I mean, about how I just opened up to you that easily bugs me a bit.”

“Well, I’m still glad you did. I think it was good for you, and I love knowing more about you, even all the bad things.” He kissed Newt’s cheek.

“Can you… Stay here for the night?” he asked shyly. He could see Thomas nod.

They laid down on the couch, Newt in Thomas’ protective arms. He hadn’t felt so comfortable in such a long time. He turned around to face the other boy. He could make out his eyes in the darkness and stared at him, smiling.

“What are you smiling at?” Thomas asked, smiling himself. Newt didn’t answer, just kissed him fondly. They stayed like that for awhile before Newt spoke up.

“Tommy?” The other boy hummed. “Could you tell me about yourself a bit? I barely know anything about you…”

Thomas giggled. “Of course.” He kissed him again and started talking.

Newt listened in awe. The boy had come to London just a few weeks ago, like he had told him. His parents had wanted him to see the world, and he had decided to come here to study a bit. Thomas told about his relationships. How he had a friend called Teresa and at the age of 16 they had started dating, but she had cheated on him. At that point Newt told him he didn’t deserve that and kissed him passionately. 

After that Thomas had realized he actually preferred boys. His parents were fine with it and Newt was so happy for him. While Thomas was telling funny stories of his childhood in a quiet voice, Newt’s eyes started to droop and eventually he fell asleep.

***

“Newt. Newt wake up! I can’t feel my arm! Hey!” Newt opened his eyes sleepily. Thomas’ face was just inches away from him and he looked uncomfortable. 

“Sorry, Newt, but you gotta let go of my arm, I can’t feel it.” Newt looked down. He was gripping Thomas’ arm like his life depended on it. 

“Oh! Sorry, I didn’t mean to!” He let go and Thomas rubbed it.

“It’s fine, but you’re shucking strong, I couldn’t take it away without waking you up.” He started laughing and Newt joined him.

When the laughing quieted down Newt kissed him. “Did you sleep well?” he asked.

“I did. But you started snoring when I was just telling how my classmate locked me up in my locker!” He pretended to be annoyed, but the smile pushed through. Newt laughed again wholeheartedly. 

“I’m sorry, Tommy”, he said between the laughs. 

“How dare you laugh at me?” Still smiling he pushed his lips against Newt’s. He answered to it immediately. They were getting more passionate and touchy by the second, and Newt’s hands found their way under Thomas’ shirt. The other boy put his hands around his neck. Newt let out little moans when Thomas bit his lower lip. 

“Tommy…” He pulled Thomas’ shirt off of him and admired the toned body. His skin looked so smooth without any ugly scars like his… He slid his hands down his body and the other body shook a bit.

“Newt… May I?” he asked and fumbled with his shirt. Newt hesitated for a bit, but after looking at him in the eyes, he nodded. Thomas pulled the shirt off slowly, he too studying the body under it.

“So pretty…” he mumbled as he kissed Newt again. Newt moaned into the kiss as Thomas started playing with his nipples. He did the same for the other boy and soon the room was full of moans of pleasure. Suddenly Thomas broke the kiss and moved his lips in his hands place. Newt could see stars and thrusted his hips forward without meaning to. Thomas grunted in surprise.

“Sorry, I didn’t-“ he started embarrassed, but Thomas was kissing him again. The other boys’ hand found it’s way to his butt, and he squeezed it. 

“Do it again”, he mumbled against his lips. Newt looked at him in the eyes.

“Make me”, he said and Thomas smirked. He started fondling with his bulge while nibbling at his nipples again. Newt couldn’t help but moan again and soon he was starting to thrust into Thomas’ hand, already leaking through his boxers.

“Tommy…” He started fumbling with the other boys’ pants, pulling them down. Thomas did the same for him, but Newt stopped him for a second.

“Thomas… There’s… There’s some on my legs too…” He looked down in shame. 

Thomas kissed his forehead and whispered, “Let me see.” He pulled the pants down all the way, Newt helping him a bit. He didn’t dare to look at him and hid his face away in his arms. He could feel Thomas’ gaze on his erection and legs. He felt humiliated because of his scars. 

Suddenly he felt something wet and warm on his thighs and looked down in shock. Thomas was kissing him! Straight on his scars! Newt’s mouth was open in shock and he couldn’t say anything. He just watched Thomas making his way down his countless scars. After he was done, he looked up to Newt.

“You’re so beautiful, Newt…” he whispered and pulled himself up to kiss him. Newt moaned and threw his arms around his neck, feeling the muscles on his back. Sudden friction on his dick made him jerk up.

“Tommy!” he yelled out as the other boy jerked his hand up and down his length. Newt was a moaning mess, sweat dripping down his temples. Thomas moved his mouth to his neck, sucking it. Newt was almost screaming at this point.

“Tommy, I’m going to… I’m going to come!” he let out. He felt Thomas soft lips by his ears.

“Come for me, Newt”, he whispered, and that was it for him. He came all over their stomachs and chests. He was breathing heavily, coming down from his high. After catching his breath, he pulled Thomas down for a passionate kiss.

“Your turn”, he said and pulled the other boys’ pants down with one swift movement. Thomas sucked in a breath and looked down to him with surprise.

“Newt…” he started, but Newt cut it off with a kiss. He caressed Thomas’ body all over while jerking him off. All the while they were kissing, mixed with Thomas’ moans.

“Newt, I…” he couldn’t even finish, before he came. Newt’s hand was slick with warm liquid and he brought it to his lips, staring straight to Thomas’ eyes. The other boy gulped and stared as Newt cleaned his hand with his tongue. 

“Shuck, Newt…” He kept his show going, and saw Thomas get hard again. He smiled up at Thomas and pulled him down for a kiss with his now clean hand.

“We’ll save that for later”, he whispered to his ear while getting up from under Thomas.

“You’re just gonna leave me like this after what you just did?” he whined at him. Newt laughed at him, leaning in to kiss him longer this time.

“Maybe I’ll do something if you come to shower with me… Who knows?” He smirked.

“You little…” Thomas smiled and stood up. Newt took a dash to the bathroom.

***

Newt and Thomas were laying on the bed, Newt in the other boys’ arms. He was tracing patterns to Thomas’ bare chest, admiring his tender skin. He studied Thomas’ features. The boy had closed his eyes and the long, dark eyelashes brushed his cheeks. He looked ethereal. He leaned up to place a soft kiss to his lips, and Thomas’ mouth’s corners rose up a bit.

Newt felt at ease. He felt like this was where he belonged. Next to Thomas. He could carry on, everything would be okay. They would take care of that man, and his mom. Thomas would be there for him, and Newt there for Thomas. They could work it out. He would wake up to another day, only to see him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, then! Feel free to tell me your thoughts! And once again, thank you to all who have read, commented and left kudos! It means so so much for me! <3


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